This week I was helping a couple that had been married for 10 years. They had lived this decade very busy in pursuits. It was brought to their attention that the 10 years may really be 1 year repeated 10 times. It was time for this couple to get off the ‘ married go round’ and do things differently. It was time to change. The following acronym may help give direction in the process of change:
Commitment: We must be dedicated to making things that aren’t working different.
Humility: Humility is about preferring and deferring. Preferring our partner before ourselves and deferring honor to our partner for the positive things that are in the relationship.
Attitude: This is the central place between stimulus (what causes us to act) and response (the action). Others can control certain elements of our lives but they cannot control our attitude.
Need: We should not expect others to meet needs that we can meet for ourselves. If we are to gain ourselves, we must give ourselves away to others. This is the basis for the law of reciprocity or The Golden Rule. What I want for myself, I will give to others.
Growth: This incorporates the mind-set that the challenges and disappointments of our lives will give new perspectives. These new perspectives will allow us to enlarge ourselves individually and relationally.
Effort: This places the emphasis on the process above the product. It is about beginning with the end in mind and appreciating the journey all along the way.
Questions to Think About: What am I doing over and over expecting different results? What needs do I need to change?
Scripture: Philippians 3:14 I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.