The Resilient Relationship

In over 20 years of counseling I am finding that durable marriages have certain vital characteristics: Here are the top 10:

  1. A good understanding of mature love. There is a knowledge that love isn’t about getting but about giving.

  2. The healthy sense of self. Healthy people make healthy decisions about healthy relationships.

  3. An ability to communicate. Seeking to understand before being understood is so important.

  4. The keen awareness of grace. Giving the benefit of the doubt is a way of life.

  5. The desire to grow. Moving toward a better self and a better relationship is a focus.

  6. A good sense of humor. Laughing at one self and not taking life too seriously takes away much pressure.

  7. The humility to seek help. Getting assistance is not considered weaknesses if there is challenges that are tough to overcome.

  8. The determination to make it. Committing is more than staying int he marriage because of vows but making the marriage really work.

  9. The establishment of trust. There is no place for secrets and no hesitation to move away from compromising situations.

  10. The significance of investment. Energy, time and money are devoted to the relationship.

    Thoughts to Ponder: What are things that our relationship has that makes it resilient? What is lacking?

    Scripture: Psalm 138:8 The Lord will fulfill his purpose for my marriage; your love,O Lord endures forever, do not abandon the works of your hands.